Respect Others: Because It Matters

“You are you, and I am me. We can agree to disagree.” 

It’s a fun, memorable way to understand the first of our 10 keys to civility, the foundational tenets of Because It Matters: Respect others. Without respect, how can we achieve the effective communication that is needed build a more productive, connected, and engaged community?

We’ve all heard about the Golden Rule since childhood—treat others the way we would like to be treated. At its core, the Golden Rule is all about respect:

•    respecting people whose opinions differ from our own
•    respecting people who look or dress or speak differently from us
•    even looking past what someone did today, but rather at who they might become tomorrow

In his best-selling book Choosing Civility, Dr. P.M. Forni identifies 25 essential rules for considerate conduct and effective human connection. Here on the Gulf Coast, before we launched our original civility campaign back in 2007, community volunteers prioritized and adapted those maxims to identify the most meaningful for our region. They became the 10 Keys to Civility, which underpinned our first Because It Matters campaign (2007-2010) and serve as the basic tenets of the reimagined Because It Matters initiative we launched last month. Of Dr. Forni’s 25 keys, a full five of them contain the word “respect.”

In many ways, the rest of our 10 Keys to Civility are tactics that must stem from a fundamental philosophy of respect for others. Paying attention. Speaking kindly. Saying thank you. In each case, respect for others (and ourselves) becomes manifest in our actions.

Respect in Action

So, how do we put this principle into practice, making respect and civility a part of our daily lives without becoming sanctimonious? Opportunities abound if we pay attention (another of the 10 Keys!):
•    Say please, thank you, and you’re welcome—with a smile—to people you encounter every day: cashiers, baristas, restaurant servers, acquaintances, and coworkers.

•    Be the first to say “hello.”

•    Allow that car to merge into traffic in front of you, even though you are already running late.

•    Take the time to focus on what your child is saying.

•    Even when your workload seems unbearable, remember that your boss is under the same—or greater—pressure than you are.

•    Hear out someone’s political or social viewpoints, even though you may be diametrically opposed to every idea they espouse.

There are hundreds of opportunities every day to show respect to those around you. It begins with setting aside the stress of daily life and remembering that each person is deserving of a little kindness, a little courtesy.

Respecting others is just one of 10 principles that The Civility Squad promotes to create a more civil society. But it all begins with respect.